It was confirmed this week that the cancer has recurred. The lymph node on the CT scan "lit up" on the PET scan, confirming the worst.
The good news is that nothing else lit up. My doctor was pleased about this.
The plan is that I will get my chemo locally at Christiana Hospital, just minutes from home. I will have the same chemo cocktail as before, with perhaps one slight change so my neuropathy does not get even worse. After 3 chemo infusions (spread over 6 weeks), I will have a repeat PET scan to re-assess the situation. I am not sure when I will start chemo. Doctor said I could start next week but that is not likely. Too many things to pull together.
The gyn onc is going to call my doctor at Christiana and discuss this plan with him, including whether to do a needle biopsy of the lymph node since it IS accessible.
I also can do nothing about my hernia until after chemo.....and it makes me nauseated almost all the time.
My hip is still killing me so I went back to Baltimore today for cortisone from Dr. Shepard in another area of my hip. Too soon to tell if it has worked. I must discontinue the FLECTOR (NSAID) patches because no NSAID can be used during chemo. I can take opioids, but I hate how they make me feel......except that I have run out of options.
Dr. Carbone, who saw me first for this problem and had me get a neck MRI, is out of town. His nurse called to tell me that something showed up in the MRI, a bad spot in my neck. To be honest, I barely heard what she was saying because I cannot handle ONE MORE THING!
I called my shoulder ortho and begged him for a shot in my rotator cuff to see if that pain can be diminished. He will see me Friday for this after I see the local gyn onc.
I am just a damn mess. And exhausted from all of these appointments and riding all over hell and creation. Thank goodness for Bob and for my sister Debbie who is by my side all the time. She really is an angel.
One intersting thing....this bad lymph node is "outside the radiated area" from where I had radiation in 2011 --- so I could have radiation in this new spot. I remember being surprised when told that radiation cannot be done twice in the same area.
So...I am coping. Not real well, but coping. I am having a difficult time talking on the phone without crying, and have over 150 new e-mails that will probably never get answered.
Thanks to family, friends, and online acquaintances for all your good thoughts.
Charlie got a gold medal at camp today. Doesn't he look proud? Makes me want to play the National Anthem!
Look at those eyes! This is the comment Laura most frequently hears.
JoAnn - I have been following your blog for some time and am so very sorry to read of this recurrence. I believe in the power of prayer and certainly will address your needs as I pray. Best wishes to you as you begin the next step for your journey – and special thanks for your loving family.
Linda
Posted by: Linda | July 27, 2012 at 05:35 PM
I'm so sorry to hear this news, JoAnn. I don't know what to say, except that you will continue to be in my thoughts and prayers. (And those eyes ARE something else, indeed!) Much love to you.
Posted by: Melissa | July 27, 2012 at 08:39 PM
I am away but typing on my kindle. I will keep it short and sweet. I am sad about these current difficult troubling facts/issues/troubles. But it makes me determined to lift you up even more. You are in my thoughts - in my heart. Big hug to you. Oh and those kiddos are darling!!! Bless them and you.
Posted by: Susan | July 28, 2012 at 02:08 AM
thanks, Susan. Have a good trip!
J
Posted by: JoAnn Kirk | July 28, 2012 at 06:18 AM
I hardly know what to say to you. Know this is not the news you had hoped for. SO many care for you and are praying for you and sending positive thoughts. Continue to rely on your wonderful family for support and strength and never forget what incredible motivators those beautiful grandchildren continue to be. Many, many hugs for you! L,M
Posted by: Margaret | July 28, 2012 at 08:57 AM
JOANN, its so hard to find the right words..our aunt had 3 pet scans we took her each time...she lived to be 90..and having a pretty darn great life too..I think of you often..so if you think of me I was more than likely thinking of you too...I love you xox,j
Posted by: judy | July 28, 2012 at 01:49 PM
Thinking of you and praying for you!!!
Posted by: Steph | July 28, 2012 at 08:54 PM
It's hard to think of the right thing to say. All I know is there are so many people in this world who love you. You are my best friend. xoxo
Posted by: Laura | July 28, 2012 at 10:30 PM
I follow Laura's blog and I also read yours and I just want to you know we are all rooting for you, praying for you and hoping for the best. I will be thinking of you as you face this new battle, I think you are stronger than you know and you have the best support team, Laura is one of a kind, I so wish I knew her in person, I think she would make a fabulous friend and from what I read on her blog she is a amazing person and momma and she loves you so much...and that's all because of YOU made her that way.
Posted by: laurie lariviere | July 29, 2012 at 07:13 PM
I know my words can't help, but please know I'm thinking of you.
Posted by: Brooke | August 01, 2012 at 07:44 AM
Just a note from a blog reader. You are in my thoughts and prayers. I have added you to a prayer chain. You have thousands out here praying for you and your family.
Posted by: Pamela Davis | August 02, 2012 at 12:20 PM